Happy Father's Day!
I know that most of you see less of your children than you would like, that you miss out on the small moments and feel forgotten.
Dad's of Divorce how are you celebrating?
Straight up, I have no idea what being a dad is like. I can't put myself in your shoes and I can't write something from your perspective. What I can tell you is that I am really fed up with choice of cards out there we are meant to buy to celebrate you.
I had the same issue last year. I find these cards more often than not to be mean.
It may be true that you fall asleep thirty seconds into watching a TV show, or that you are ashamed to say you are tired and insist you are resting your eyes. Maybe you drink more than a beer or a bottle of wine, or that your children treat you like an ATM. Could it be that your child is good looking and intelligent just like you? Why do card makers think comments about the above are relevant to who you are as a Dad?
It is said you men receive very few compliments, so here it is from me to you on Father's Day, especially the ones who are struggling post divorce. I am fully aware how hard it is for you.
I know that most of you see less of your children than you would like, that you miss out on the small moments and feel forgotten. Out of sight is not out of mind. You turn up when you are allowed, and you do your best struggling to do what is right even when you are hurting.
On behalf of children, we want you to know it is really quality vs quantity. When we know that you are there 24/7 in the background we sleep better. When we mess up or need advice and we know we can count on you, you make us safer in the world. We are too young to understand how much we appreciate you and love you, but we do. Keep turning up because we need you.
NB: Step-dad? Non biological dad? Alienated dad? I am saving a post for you all next year.
If you are struggling with being a dad, please get support. Reach out, find a group, start a group. Read this inspirational interview about a man who started a WhatsApp group for men to support each other.
Jacky’s Sister
Want to share your story? How you experience Father's Day? Some tips for others? Reach out to me at contact@angryexwife.com
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